Be Myself.

JH’s school was closed for 1.5 weeks due to positive covid cases in his school. Hence he’d been attending daycare for his virtual classes. Last night, the conversation below happens:

JH: “Mommy, can I bring the charger to daycare?”
Me: “Why do you need the charger?”
JH: “Because I see all my friends bring the charger for their computers & phone. I want to bring it too.”
Me: “We always make sure your IPAD is fully charged, it’s enough for you to use it for the whole day. Also, you should know yourself, the more things you bring, the more you forget to bring it home.”
JH: “Yeah mommy, I think you’re right. I don’t have to follow other people. Teacher HX said I should be myself because everyone is different.”

At that moment, I felt proud that he learns to see himself as an individual person, not having to succumb to the peer pressure of ‘’just because others do it.” It might seem like nothing to most parents, but given the same situation 2 years ago, my kid would probably throw a tantrum if I told him that he shouldn’t bring the charger. Even after undergoing behavioral therapy for the last 2 years, he still tells us that he doesn’t have any friends or that his friends didn’t want to include him in their playtime. As much as it breaks out heart, we know it will be a continuous journey to help him develop social skills and competencies to make and keep (true) friends.

A story about Empathy.

It was a usual Saturday where I needed to bring the kids for their usual piano class and therapy class. Hubbs was away for a work trip so it was just the three us. They both ask to bring a piece of transformer figurine to play and I casually said yes. It all went well in the car until I heard a ‘SNAP’. I turn around, JH lets out the biggest outcry, and he buries his head into his hands, I can already feel the meltdown creeping up. Before I could say anything to get him to calm down, his sister who witnesses the whole ordeal said: “It’s ok Gor Gor, you can have mine.” Immediately his eyes lit up and thanked his sister profusely.

All this happen at the back of the car while I was driving. In that instant, i feel so proud of my little bunny with her emotional capacity. What Junna did have soothe all those big feelings that rise within his brother.

It is also then I realized empathy can’t be taught, it’s nurtured. Children cannot be what they can’t see, it’s important we show them compassion, kindness. We need to take greater care to nurture a child’s soul. Help them thrive emotionally to create harmony in this world, starting from our home.